There is an old joke, which isn’t very funny, that goes as follows:

There was a competition, much like the Golden Ticket contest of Willy Wonka fame, for one lucky winner to get a full tour of heaven. When the winner was announced, he was picked up by his angelic tour guide who began walking him through the massive office buildings in which all the machinations of heaven are contained. They saw angels running back and forth, involved in the many functions needed to keep the world operational. At some point they arrived at the 13th floor, the floor of Tefillah (prayer), where they saw two massive offices with angels running all around, printing emails, receiving faxes, filing the many prayers away in the respective categories or forwarding them on to the proper department. After they passed these two immense work-spaces, they came to a small cubicle, with one angel sitting in it. He was playing solitaire, snapping his gum, and generally looked extremely bored. After a few minutes a fax came in, he took it, filed it away, and then returned to his solitaire game. The contest-winner who was taking the tour asked his angelic tour guide, “What are those two immense offices and what is this tiny cubicle?” The tour guide responded, “Those two rooms are the offices of Bakashot (requests), the first one is people asking for healing, whether for themselves or people they know, and the second is people asking for money.” The man responded, “So, what about the cubicle?” “Oh that?” The angel replied, “That is the office for people offering thanks to Hashem.”

As I said, the joke really isn’t very funny, but it is very telling…and very true. In life, there are always important aspects of what we do that are neglected. Saying thank you, particularly to Hashem, is, and has traditionally been, an area which is neglected by most. This is the first lesson about Tefillah and serving Hashem which we can learn from the story of Yaakov and his dream-ladder. As soon as Yaakov wakes up from his dream, he offers thanks to Hashem by declaring that a tenth of everything he acquires will be dedicated to Him. If we would only realize what we had and how much Hashem gives us, we would not be able to hold back our thanks. Do you realize that if you have a dollar or two in your pocket right now (or have access to that amount in your bank account or from your parents) that you are among the richest 8% of the world’s population? And do we ever consider the fact that if we have a a bed to sleep in and a roof over our heads at night that we are better off than 75% of the world? If you are reading this article from a computer with internet access you are a part of an “elite” 3% of the world!

There are, of course, other areas which we, in our generation (myself included), neglect in terms of Tefillah and serving Hashem.

Nowadays, everyone loves to talk about Tefillah as being an expression of the heart. We find that people find their best “Tefillah experiences” in Carlebach Minyanim, Kumztizes, and other such “spiritual experiences”. This idea comes from the fact that Tefillah is called עבודה שבלב – the service of the heart. Everyone focuses on developing a spiritual and emotional experience in davening. This is important, in fact it may even be the highest level of what Tefillah is all about, but this attitude is neglecting a crucial and core part of what Tefillah (and serving Hashem in general) is all about.

As we said, Tefillah is called עבודה שבלב. What happened to the עבודה part? The heart is a part, but עבודה שבלב includes עבודה. When we think about עבודה two things come to mind, the first is the simple meaning of the word – work. The root is the same as that of a servant or slave and the word עבודה connotes working hard and being in service to something outside yourself. The second thing which comes to mind is the service which was conducted in the Beit Hamikdash. Also call עבודה, this service was incredibly structured and was a very hard, demanding and draining service. It required waking up early in the morning, moving large animals around the massive courtyard and working long hours. The details of the service were also incredibly meticulous. One mis-step, blood sprinkled in the wrong corner or a wrong measurement, could lead to the whole service being considered disgusting and could even lead a Cohen to serious consequences.

There is a great tension in the experience of relating to Hashem. On the one hand it must be emotional, spiritual and stem from the heart – the לב. While, on the other hand it must have form, structure and discipline and certainly isn’t always easy – it is an עבודה. This is what is expressed to us in the famous pasuk and song from Tehillim (100:2), “עבדו את-יהוה בשמחה – serve Hashem with joy”. Everyone quotes this half of the pasuk as a proof that a person must always serve Hashem with emotion and happiness. However, the second half of the pasuk continues, “באו לפניו, ברננה – come before Him with song“. We see from elsewhere in Tehillim (126:2) that the idea of רנה or song is an expression of the tongue. The tongue, which gives form and structure to our words, teaches us that if we want to come before Hashem we must take our unbridled שמחה and channel it in a way which has form, structure and meaning – רנה. A song is a structured expression of unbridled happiness and it is much more meaningful than the raw emotion itself.

For some reason this aspect of Tefillah and serving Hashem has been seriously neglected in today’s day and age. We (myself included) prefer to go the easy route of singing, dancing and having “spiritual experiences” because it is far easier and more immediately rewarding than having to work hard to form a relationship with Hashem.

This is, however, the only way to really develop a real relationship with Hashem. If we only go from “spiritual high” to “spiritual high” – from kumzitz to kumzitz, from NCSY havdalah to NCSY havdalah, from Carlebach davening to ebbing – we will never develop a lasting and strong relationship with Hashem. We see this from the dream of Yaakov. The angels, who were ascending to the heavens, were not merely sucked up in one fell swoop, abducted, like some alien movie, but rather they ascended a ladder. They moved step-by-step, in an orderly, structured way, and through their own effort – they climbed the ladder.

I have been known to say that a person must learn to be “Shomer Negiah with God” – והמבין יבין. Like in all relationships we encounter in this life, if you don’t invest you won’t see any long-lasting returns. The expression “easy come, easy go” comes to mind. If we want to form real, lasting, and deep relationships with Hashem, or anyone for that matter, we must also focus on the עבודה aspect. We must work hard, pay attention to details, and channel our raw emotions through form and function which gives those emotions meaning. We must develop and work on the relationship and not just rely on those fleeting, spiritual experiences.

If we balance these two ideas, both the עבודה and the לב, we will truly be able to have a relationship with Hashem, and really be able to master the depth of Tefillah, the עבודה שבלב.

I want challenge everyone to focus their energies on two things,

1. Focus on what you have, instead of what you want or need. Be more thankful and offer you thanks to Hashem more often.
2. Focus on the עבודה of Tefillah and your relationship with Hashem. Learn the basic meaning of the words, daven in English if you need to, and learn about the structure, form and function of Tefillah. Learn to channel that raw emotion of ebbing, kumzitzes and havdalah into a real, structured עבודה and then you will be able to tap into the depth of real Tefillah, the עבודה שבלב.