This weeks Torah portion, Parsha Mishpatim, is an extensive parshah that contains many commandments. To be specific it contains 23 positive commandments and 30 negative commandments. Many commandments are listed at first and then there are a group of commandments that if a man transgresses he will be put to death. When reading through those commandments that will ensure a death penalty I came across one that I reread again. It said, “One who strikes his father or his mother shall surely be put to death.” Rashi specifically says that one who does that will be put to death by strangulation. I remembered learning in the Kizur Shulchan Aruch something that I did not understand at first but that related to honoring your parents. It said that even if you are sitting somewhere where many can see you, adorned in fancy clothing, and your parents come and deliberately tear your clothes, strike you on the head, and spit on your face, you may not shame them. Even if they hit you and embarrass you, which is like killing someone, you may not hit them back. Why is that fair? I argued about it with many teachers trying to understand and I finally reached three conclusions. First, we will not understand everything in the Torah and even if it does not seem fair the rules cannot be adjusted for different situations. For now it still pains me to think that abusive children can’t fight back. However, the Kitzur Shulchan Aruch says that they can go to the Jewish court. Second, I tried to imagine the situation of being hit infront of everyone and imagine how much strength it would take to stay silent. That man may not be able to shame his parents in this world but the amount of reward he will get in the next world, in Olam Haba, is probably enormous. Third, when a Jew honors a parent who hurts them it makes Torah seem greater. Wouldn’t you think it would be the opposite way, that Torah looks biased towards the parents and unfair towards the child? Not necessarily. Honoring your parent is like honoring G-d. If you are able to honor G-d even when you are going through a rough time it shows the immense respect that Torah can teach someone. Torah can teach someone to go against their nature simply to do what is told. Changing your ways takes a plethora of restraint and inner strength. Torah teaches humans how to do what is thought to be unable to be done.